The Top Ten Films of All Time, as chosen by Ali G. I kid you not. My favorite bit is the last one:

    10. Jaws 4
    Altho’ da first few Jaws flims ain’t all dat, by da time dey made da fourf dey woz really gettin’ dere shit togetha. Me still has nightmares about da bit where dey iz in da sea and den, completely hunexpectedly, dis big shark appearz and den if dat weren’t bad enuf it only goes and eats people. To dis day, me swear me never goin’ swimmin’ in Hollywood where dese attacks ‘appened and instead would choose places on da ovver side of da world like Ostaralia.

I’m still laughing. Ma Snook, you’re gonna love these. 🙂


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  1. This cracked me up so hard, Kris. What’s truly scary is that I have seen every movie on there except “Barb Wire” (yes, I’ve watched “Cool as Ice”…um, three times, actually. I sorta like it. Don’t judge me!)

  2. We won’t discuss it… like the fact that I used to LOVE the Police Academy movies when I was little. (In my defense, HBO showed them, like, seven times a day and there was nothing else on, ever. Or something.)

  3. I’ve seen every single movie on that list. I don’t even feel guilty about it. Is that wrong of me?

  4. Who’s Ali G again? Is he that guy driving the limo in Madonna’s “Music” video?

  5. Yeah, that’s him, Bill. He was famous way before that in England. It’s a Jewish comedian playing this insane wannabe black guy from the London suburbs. He started out as a recurring bit on one of the late night comedy shows where he’d interview some Member of Parliament or something, and he’d get them to say ridiculous things because they’d think he was legit. I saw one where the talked to American’s FBI Director and asked him which states you can have sex with 16-year-olds in. It’s pretty friggin’ funny. Then he got his own chat show, and then he started popping up in Madonna videos and hosting the MTV Europe awards. Now I think his 15 minutes are kinda up, even though he’s releasing a movie.

  6. big up the staines massive

  7. Ah, OK. I remembered when the Queen Mum died, there was some bit in the papers (are they still papers if you read them online?) talking about how the Queen Mum used to imitate Ali G for the great-grandkids. I think she’d snap her fingers and say “Respec'” or something. I only recently made the Madonna connection, though.

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