So I get this e-mail, right, from some woman saying that she visited web-goddess and “noticed” that I wasn’t registered on very many search engines. And if I wanted, I could pay her company to list me on 300,000 directories. Uh-huh. So I sent her a snooty e-mail back, saying that if she had, in fact, visited my site, she would’ve seen that it’s a personal site and I could care less about advertising myself. I also sarcastically thanked her for the spam. I BCCed Snookums on the message to get his response. He said:

    snookums: Your e-mail is very polite. I’d probably put something like: “I’d love to buy your product. In fact I have a purchase order, if I can just remember where it is. Spammer’s purchase order…. Spammer’s purchase order…. Oh! I remember. I shoved it up my ass. I wrote it out and shoved it right up my ass, therefore ruining any chance you had of selling me your lame services.”

I’m still laughing. If you don’t immediately get the reference, it’s from the “Jesus vs. Satan” episode of “South Park” where Cartman is explaining why he didn’t invite Pip to his birthday party.

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  1. Got the same one too. Thumbnail of my site with tiny pixel people being drawn to it by magnetic attraction. Spammers get worse! Aaagh!

  2. Wow! I didn’t get the pixel people picture. Either that or Yahoo filtered it for me. I probably shouldn’t have written her back; I’m just opening the door for more spam. I got one today that appeared to be a message between two friends. This guy’s like, “Lu – I found it! Use this site to really speed up your surfing.” And of course my address was hidden in a BCC, making it look like I randomly intercepted this friendly greeting. That sort of stuff pisses me off.

  3. And her address has officially bounced my e-mail. Damn spammer piece of crap…

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