More fun with Australian commercials

More fun with Australian commercials!
Remember this game? I give you the setup for a commercial on Australian television that is currently infuriating me, and you guess the conclusion and what product is being sold. (Sorry Aussies, but you’ll have to sit this one out.) Here we go: A nice yuppie-looking couple are sitting down to tea at Grandma’s house. As the old lady sets down the tray, her budgie (pet bird) flies past and – unbeknownst to Granny – craps in the wife’s teacup. Yes, we actually see it plop. Thinking quickly, the wife mentions to Granny that one of the kids has started swimming lessons, and wouldn’t she like to look at the picture on the mantel? As the husband helpfully distracts the old woman, the wife gets an idea…

How does she avoid drinking the tea without offending Granny? (Note: This is a commercial so we can’t assume she does anything rational like, oh, point out that the budgie just pooped in her cup. That would be too easy.) So what does she do and what product is this advertising?

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  1. This is going to sound vulgar, so I apologize in advance–but it was the first thing that popped into my head:

    The wife pulls a maxi pad out of her purse and pours the tea into it–naturally, it’s all absorbed quite nicely. Then she tucks the pad back into her purse, pretends to have just finished the tea as Granny turns back around, and all is well as we fade out on the brand name of the maxi pad.

    I’m not even close, am I?

    (This theory comes from the fact that I am still traumatized by the “use a tampon to stop a boat leak” commercial here in the US…)

  2. I was thinking the same thing. Something absorbent– either MJ’s suggestion, or maybe a diaper? ( I don’t know if the kids were along on this trip.)

  3. Ding ding ding! Max pretty much nailed it, except that she dunks the pad rather than pours the tea onto it. Then she tucks it under her bum – on the couch! – and proceeds to fake finishing off the tea. I still shudder every time I see it. They’re sponsoring Australian Idol so I’ll probably be seeing it four times a week for the next five months.

    IN WHAT UNIVERSE WOULD THIS PERSUADE A WOMAN OF NORMAL INTELLIGENCE TO BUY THIS PRODUCT?

    I ask you.

  4. wow. i wasn’t thinking of anything along those lines….that’s, um, rather disturbing. and ugh, maxipads. ugh.

  5. Yay! Go me! 🙂

    (I am shocked and saddened that I was right, though–I mean, this ad sounds so gross on a dozen different levels.)

  6. I should also point out that “Maxi Pad” was what the crueler kids in elementary school called me, so maybe I have some sort of connection (ew!) with ads of this sort…

  7. The thing is, it’s not even a big bulky pad like you might expect. It’s this thin little thing that looks like a panty liner. The notion that it could soak up a whole teacup full of liquid is RIDICULOUS. Not that anyone would need it to ANYWAY. (Sometimes I wonder what the hell kind of ideas men get about the female reproductive system from these ads. They’re so wrong.) AND, it doesn’t swell up or change color or in any way indicate that it’s just soaked up a bunch of tea. When she shoves it under her leg it looks exactly as it did when she whipped it out. Because that’s what feminine hygiene products do, boys; they make all that icky liquid MAGICALLY DISAPPEAR.

    Grrr.

  8. (And I totally sympathize, Maxi Pad. I was “Krispy Wheats and Raisins” for a while there.)

  9. Feminine products seem to have a bizarre crudeness in their advertisements in Australia (I think you’ve mentioned the ‘Pookie’ ad before, Kris?). I can just see the marketing execs sitting around a boardroom, thinking they’re so clever at using humour to confront taboo topics, but most of these ads are just stupid. Well, that’s my two cents anyway 🙂

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