Insufferable Know-It-Alls I Have Dealt With Today:

  • The woman who interrupted me while helping a customer select a pattern size and then blatantly contradicted my advice. The customer then turned to her as the authority, and I’m like, “SHE DOESN’T EVEN WORK HERE.” I finally had to actually shoo her away from the counter.
  • The woman who interrupted while Michelle and I were discussing with another customer about former employee Mel and whether she’d had her baby yet. The Know-It-All was actually claiming that she remembered the baby’s due date better than the people who worked with Mel.
  • The old biddy who actually chastised another woman’s children in the shop. I KNOW! Granted, the little brats were running all over the place and it was during the lunchtime rush, so patience was low all around. But she suddenly bursts out in her loud, bossy voice: “Children, I need you to be quiet and stop running around!” I was like, “Oh noooo she DI’INT!” It’s pretty much a cardinal rule that you don’t chastise somebody else’s kids, right? Especially when the mother is there? Because what you’re really saying is, “You’re a bad mom and you can’t control your rugrats.” I was so hoping she’d get a punch in the nose.
  • The woman who interrupted me while telling the Knitting Clinic ladies about the prizes we’re going to sponsor at next year’s Easter Show, interjecting that she could tell me all the deadlines and who to get in contact with. I’m like, “I’m already in contact with them. From months ago. You know-it-all cow.”
  • The woman who watched me doing an expense on our point-of-sale system and told me I was doing it wrong, that I needed to staple a bunch of receipts to the report slip. I love it when non-employees lecture me on store procedure! “Well, I’m the one that does the banking,” I retorted, “and I DON’T CARE if they’re on there, SO I’M NOT PUTTING THEM THERE.” And then I tore them up and put them in the trash. Yeah, I’d reached the end of my tether at that point.

And you know the best part? IT WAS ALL THE SAME WOMAN. (I’m sure some of you can guess. She’s my nemesis. But do not speak her name, for I fear her minions…)


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  1. Oh, I can’t wait for the day when I return to the work force and have to deal with sucky customers again. Sigh. Will have to get my ‘don’t give a shit’ hat resized.

  2. I think you-all should take out an order preventing her entering the shop. Minions? There can’t be that many of them and they can’t spend that much to make it worth while you having to put up with her. The woman is poisonous. And bad for business. I feel like leaving the shop when I see her there.

  3. sounds like she has a crush on you Kris

  4. I know people who know people who can sort this one out if you like……….make these problems go away……..why didn’t we just tell her what we really thought…… to me next to the mohair on thursday at 5.19pm there is only one possible minion I know of but perhaps the last lesson sorted her out too

  5. Who doesn’t looooove working retail? I’m getting ready to go there now. 🙂 Joy! (Vegas in less than a week…I know I can make it)

  6. Buh. You’ve obviously got a much better handle on your temper than I do. I would’ve snapped and said something to her which involved heavy use of the F-word.

    Dude! What the hell is she doing hanging out there so much, anyway? It sounds like she was there ALL DAY just to torment you.

  7. You don’t know the half of it, Moire. She’s scheduled to be there every other Friday. It’s all I can do not to call in sick those days!

    And I would like to record to show that I actually started out the day by being extremely generous, by congratulating her on her prize-winning piece at the Easter Show and telling her I liked it (which I did). Then I noticed that she’d not only brought it in, she’d brought in her big prize ribbon and draped it down the middle of the table in the knitting section. WHAT-EVER.

  8. I’m all for telling kids to shut up. If their parents don’t, who will? People who tell kids to shut up are heroes, because some parents are just no good.

    Parenthood should be regulated. Okay back in my box now.

  9. Well, YES, it’s not that kids shouldn’t behave better. It’s just that the type of parents who let their kids run around wild tend to be the ones to react the worst when you call them on it! Hence, me waiting for her to get punched in the nose. Which never happened. *sigh*

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