I was genuinely sad to hear that Don Knotts died. Farewell, Barney Fife. You and your one bullet used to make me laugh and laugh.
Any of you Sydneysiders have experience with cleaning services? The Snook and I have finally accepted that we’re on the wrong side of the fundamental paradox of “liking to live in a clean house” and “being totally and completely averse to actually cleaning.” And if I learned anything from The Sims, it’s that maid service is the primary key to a happy home life. Now we just need a recommendation…
I’ve had a case of the mean reds for the past few days. I don’t know why. It’s just like a switch was flipped, and suddenly I’m feeling depressed and bored and nervous. I have the urge to eat and eat and eat. (Before you say it’s probably hormonal, my Depo shots generally take care of that.) Could it be because the past few weeks have been so easy and I don’t think I’ve earned it? Is it because I’m actually afraid of getting to goal? Both are possible. I’m also dreading tomorrow’s inaugural workout with the Dove. For some reason I feel really embarrassed about him knowing how unfit I am. I know, I know – this goes against my whole “why hide the obvious?” dieting ethos, but I can’t help it. Sure, losing (nearly) twenty kilos is an accomplishment, but what if he expects me to be able to run faster and do more push-ups than I can? I’m afraid.
I did turn some of this anxiety into a positive, though. I headed out tonight with a vague goal of getting to Centennial Park and actually running the jogging track inside. (Usually I turn around because it takes me thirty minutes just to get there.) I was pretty tired when I finally arrived. The day was hot and my sports bra was too tight, so I had a stitch threatening the whole time. “Self,” I said, “if you can actually make it around the track without walking, I don’t care if you walk all the way home.” So I did it. I paused halfway around to have a sip from a drinking fountain, but it was no more than ten seconds so I’m counting that as a win. I timed myself at 26 minutes and I found someone who measured the loop to 3.7km. With a little mathematical extrapolation, that equates to a 5K time of 35 minutes… which just happens to be my time from the last 5K race I ran. I think that’s good. I mean, I’d already been puffing up and down across Surry Hills for thirty minutes just to get there, so if I’d been starting fresh I think I would’ve taken a good amount of time off it. As promised to myself, I walked most of the way home. It felt pretty good.
How to Speed-Clean Your Kitchen. Are you reading this, Snookums? ARE YOU? Because we are straight up slobs. (Link courtesy of krisalis.)
This one’s for the fluffies: the knitwear of Lizabeth Oliveria. It’s pretty lewd – well, except for the Superman – and DUDE, it’s all mohair! (Link courtesy of SixDifferentWays.)
OH. MY. GOD. “Lazy Muncie.” It’s the “Indiana response” to that “Chronic-WHAT-cles of Narnia” rap from SNL, and it’s BRILLIANT. (A warning to certain members of my family though: It does contain bad words. Download at your own risk.) I wasn’t expecting much, but I nearly spat banana all over my monitor when they got Jim Davis (creator of Garfield) to throw a gang sign. The roll call of famous Hoosiers is awesome, and the “move your ass to Fort Wayne” chorus is pretty good too. I just loved seeing Indiana stuff in a rap video – Bob Evans, Sears, a barn… Too, too funny. (Link courtesy of Moire, who may now have to film the Fort Wayne response.)
Oh, dear GOD. Pugs in hats. I think this one’s my favorite. (We’re cat people, but I just know the Snook is going to love this. Funny animals crack him up.)
TWoP have posted a Serenity recap and, though the author’s writing style sounds a little weird to me, it’s neat to read about the movie from the point-of-view of a serious Firefly fan.
I’m soooo close to a major milestone. I lost another 800g to bring me to 19.2kg lost in total. I want to get to 20kg so badly. My BMI is currently 25.5, so I only need to lose another kilogram or so to put me in the healthy bracket. Do you understand how momentous this is? It’s like the horizon is rushing up to meet me. In one week, maybe two, I WON’T BE FAT ANYMORE. Oh sure, I’ll still have a pudgy belly and my jogging speed will still be laughably slow, but no matter what anybody says to me, I won’t be overweight. The little family jokes about Kris being chubby that I’ve been hearing for ten years? Not anymore. Feeling ashamed whenever some crappy tabloid news show does a story on the “obesity epidemic”? Not anymore. Automatically reaching for the largest garment on the rack? Not anymore. I feel like I’m in freefall here and it’s a little scary. When did this happen? When did I turn into somebody who’s not me? I’ve actually had experiences in the past few weeks when I’ve been hanging out with people bigger than me, and I’ve gotten a shock when going to the bathroom and catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I’m used to changing my hair but I’m not used to changing shape. Today I wore pigtails and I suddenly became obsessed with how big my head looks on my now-skinny neck. Do I have a bobblehead? You guys would tell me, right?
All exhilarations and anxieties aside, I had a great laugh at WW tonight. Our topic was “putting myself first,” which is the habit I have the least trouble with, quite frankly. I have no kids or family to support here. You’ve read my blog. I’m always first. But anyway, we were supposed to talk amongst ourselves about our plans for “putting ourselves first” this week. My discussion partner had, like, the best quote ever: “Well, I haven’t been exercising much lately – you know, because of work stress and, well, I’m being stalked – but this week I plan–” And I’m like, “WAIT. You’re being STALKED?” Which, you know, SCARY and all, but also hilarious within the context of the boring talks we usually have. If ever you need to justify hanging around the house, stalker avoidance is one of the best excuses you can have.
My name is Kris. I’ve been blogging since the 90’s. I live in Sydney, Australia, and I spent most of my career in the tech industry.
No AI used in writing this blog, ever. 100% human-generated.
Woot, my knee-jerk don’t-overthink-it pub-quiz answer was Iran which seems to be [✓]. I ‘knew’ it was more populous than…
Congrats and to many more 🙌🏽
My home economics teacher taught us to use “J cloths” as press cloths. (Cellulose cleaning cloths). The upside of using…
Special thanks to Matt Hinrichs for the site logo!
One response