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The Snook and I just got back from finally seeing that pirate movie. As we’d been eagerly awaiting its arrival in Australia for, oh, four months, it was probably inevitable that we’d be let down a little bit. Eh, I dunno. It was enjoyable and two hours of watching Johnny Depp are never misspent, but somehow it just didn’t buckle my swash the way I expected it to. A lot of people said they felt it ran too long, which might be part of it, but what I noticed the most was a lack of surprise. I wanted something to happen, anything that I hadn’t already seen coming miles away. It felt like I’d already seen every good bit in the trailer. I’m also annoyed because I spent the whole film waiting for Johnny to say the line from the trailer about “bloodthirsty pirates that cannot be killed”, and he never did! I hate it when they do that. Orlando was good but he’s always so deathly serious. He never plays characters with any sense of humor. I end up giggling at his romantic lines when I should be swooning. And lastly, sorry boys, but Keira Knightley failed to impress. She’s got great hair, but her upper lip is bigger than her lower one! Am I the only one that thought that was weird?

Ouch.

Friday Five:

1. Is the name you have now the same name that’s on your birth certificate? If not, what’s changed?
Yup. Most folks nowadays call me Kris rather than Kristine though. A few who knew me in grade school still call me Kristy.

2. If you could change your name (first, middle and/or last), what would it be?
I like my name, except for the fact that everybody either A) spells it wrong when writing it down or B) pronounces it wrong when reading it out loud. (“Yeah, there’s an E at the end there. Hence Kristeeeen. Not Kristen.”) But I wouldn’t change my name over that. I’d just prefer everybody in the world learn how to spell/pronounce it properly.

3. Why were you named what you were? (Is there a story behind it? Who specifically was responsible for naming you?)
I always thought that my parents had just liked the name, but a few years ago while talking with my mother she mentioned that “Kristine” had been her best friend in school. I never knew that. I don’t know anything more about her, but that’s who I’m named for.

4. Are there any names you really hate or love? What are they and why?
I like names that pack in a lot of options, like my name. I lobbied pretty strongly for my cousin Megan to be named “Katherine”, because I reckoned it would be nice to choose from Katherine, Kate, Katie, Kathy, etc. I also like traditional names that aren’t going to be embarrassing when the person is eighty years old. Can you imagine going to the nursing home to visit “Dakota” or “Jaden”? I don’t think so.

5. Is the analysis of your name at kabalarians.com / triggur.org / astroexpert accurate? How or how isn’t it?
I did the Kabalarians a long time ago and at the time I thought it was pretty accurate. The triggur.org site says I am weak of spirit and hate happy people. I am also apparently a lousy drunk. Yeah, I’d go with that.

RIP Johnny Cash and John Ritter. The Snook and I were watching the news last night when we got the jaw-dropping news about Cash. Snookums has called a special meeting of his “Guinness Club” at the pub tonight to drink some beer and mourn the man in black. I didn’t hear about Ritter til I read it on Max’s site this morning. So sad. Remember when he played “Ted” on Buffy?

Sidenote: Did anyone else do a double-take on the quote from Bono in that Johnny Cash article? “I considered myself a friend, he considered me a fan – he indulged me.” Either Bono or the BBC messed up the quote, or Bono rather hilariously misunderstood his relationship with Cash.

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Contest: My company has just launched a new product called the Dreamio. Seriously. An expensive, high-end consumer electronic device called a Dreamio. The mind boggles. Do marketers actually get paid to come up with this stuff? My co-workers and I are having fun coming up with other things more deserving of the name. My favorites so far have been: a luxury pillow, a sex toy, and a “soccer playing Smurf”. Got any better? I’ll send a Harry Potter knitted bookmark to the person who comes up with the best alternative. Post your suggestions in the comments.

Unless it rains soon, as of October 1st it will become illegal in Sydney to use a lawn sprinkler or wash your car with a hose. Premier Bob Carr says that this will be remembered as “the first time global warming affected our way of life”. While homebrewing is not yet banned, I think the Snook’s going to have to work on making the process a little more water-efficient.

Last night I organized our entire CD collection and put them all into new binders. I was amused to see that we have a CD for every letter of the alphabet except for U and Z. Any recommendations? The Snook suggested UB40 and ZZTop, but I’m thinking we can do better than that…

Want to help make the world’s longest scarf? The project is being run as part of next year’s Stitched Up Textile Festival in Wangaratta, Australia. Even beginning knitters can take part! Using 8-ply wool and 4mm needles, cast on 66 stitches and knit one metre lengths of garter stitch (knit every row). They should end up being 12 inches wide. Then just send them to the address listed. After the world record is verified, they’ll break up the lengths and use them to make blankets for the needy. I’m going to be doing it!

Did you ever have one of those experiences where you try to do something normal and it turns out completely surreal? Last night I met the Snook in the city to buy his computer monitor. We decided to hire a cab and save on the $30 delivery fee. So we walked down York Street from the Queen Victoria Building, went in the shop, and paid for the monitor. I’m positive that only took fifteen minutes. We left with the box and hailed a cab to take it home. Two minutes later a man ran over as we were sitting at the red light. “You guys might want to get out,” he said. “There’s a protest going on up there and the cops have blocked the street.” What? It was like a flash mob. Sometime during the fifteen minutes we were at the computer store, a hundred Chilean protestors converged on York Street and started chanting about Pinochet and anti-Americanism. It was a little weird. We decided to stay with our cabbie though and he managed to get us through, only to run into atrocious traffic everywhere else. Eventually we made our way around to Glebe but the only street to our house from that direction is one-way… going the other way. “It’s okay,” I said. “We can just go around the block.” “No, it’s cool!” the driver said, before throwing it into reverse and speeding down the street backwards. The Snook and I were both yelling and holding on for life as he explained that the police cameras can only bust you if they see your car pointing the wrong way down the one-way street. How comforting. We finally screeched to a stop outside the apartment and we scrambled out. The fare? Thirty dollars. I’ll be sticking to mass transportation from now on. Sheesh.